Words, punctuated.

Quick update, thanks to insomnia.  I wanna make an actual post soon, but for now I just felt like posting something.

That damn new House episode today got me all depressed.  Did anyone else see it?  I don't want to give out spoilers, so I really can't say much... but goddamn.  I can't stop thinking about it now.

On the plus side, I've got a lot of new music that I love.  Matthew Good Band is one of my new favorites, as is Airborne Toxic Event.  Check out this live performance... its absolutely amazing and you won't regret giving it a listen. (Edit: embedded it)



Check the lyrics for this song: this is one of the most powerful songs I've heard.  The lyrics really hit me hard.
recycledlovesongs.com/indie-music/the-airborne-toxic-event-sometime-around-midnight-lyrics

I visited Troy this past weekend, mainly because Bobby was up there for Accepted Students' Day, and I figured it was a great chance to get to see RPI people and him all at once.  Unfortunately there was a bit of drama, but overall it was all quite important that things happened as they did.  I know what I have to do with certain people; I just need to act, and not be afraid anymore.

But enough of that.  I should try to sleep for reals.

Figured I might as well post some shots of the game Jeff and I are working on, to prove I am in fact not sitting on my ass all day every day.  (Though technically, I am sitting since I do the work at my computer)

First, let me say that I took these quick, originally to show someone online late at night.  Hence, they're uncropped and a bit large, and I apologize for that.  I've resized them, but feel free to "Right Click > View Image > Zoom" to see them at full size.  Lots of detail on these models.

( Screenshots, bro. )

Aside all that, I might as well also mention that my neurologist has given me a 1-month trial of Lexapro, though somewhat ironically, not for depression.  Saw her two days ago and she said all my tests - blood, brain MRI, and EEG - were perfect.  Apparently I'm one of the healthiest people she's ever seen there.  However, during the EEG, I showed some significant mental slowdown, which could very well be caused by poor regulation/secretion of serotonin... and we all know what drug helps with serotonin, don't we.  So yep!  Started taking Lexapro yesterday, and I'm rather optimistic about it overall.  I suppose I'm a bit concerned about the potential wright gain; I'm ~138 lbs. and just getting to a point where I'm very happy with my body, so it would suck royally if I suddenly started to put on pounds.  Oh, and it saddens me that I have to watch my caffeine intake now.  I made the mistake of drinking something with espresso within a half-hour of taking my first pill, and for the rest of the day suffered the most insane hyperactivity I have ever experienced.  Note to self: do not do that again seriously what were you thinking.

I've been watching far too much TV recently.  USA has its whole "NCIS all day" thing going on, and then they usually follow it up with House... and there's the new season of Scrubs on Tuesdays... and I might be watching Burn Notice as I type this...

So, let's see.  First up - a lot of my friends seem to not believe me when I tell them that there are wild turkeys on our lawn every day, eating the bird seed my sister puts out for them.  To assist with my case, I've got some photos!

( THAR BE SOME TURKEYS THAR )

Let's see, what else...

Well, first let's get the interesting things out of the way.  This past weekend was certainly interesting - I went with Bobby and his father up to Vermont to go skiing at Killington.  Their family owns one of the condos on the hill, and they tend to go every possible weekend starting in the winter and running until April.  Bobby had asked if I wanted to go, and despite my better logic about survival and personal fears, I somehow found myself in their car when we arrived in VT at 1am on Saturday.  I've never skied before, and between my awful balance and physique and my intense fear of heights, I kinda sorta figured it would have stayed that way.  What I had not expected was that: (1) Bobby is an expert skier who can teach me well and help me from killing myself, (2) there's a free adult learner hill by their house, and (3) they already had equipment for me since, sadly, Bobby and I are the same clothing size for the most part (he's 17, and I'm 22).  So long story short, I skied quite a lot.  The learner hill is actually borderline between green circle and blue square on difficulty, so it was a good place to learn.  I apparently picked up the sport quite fast - by the third time down the hill (which took roughly 8 minutes to run top-to-bottom) I was rarely falling, and after a few more runs I wasn't falling at all.  On Sunday, I was almost flawless, save for a few silly spills here and there.  I think that I had the most difficult time simply using the damn lift back up the hill.  I literally had a panic attack on it the first time; I can barely look down a flight of stairs without freezing, and all of a sudden I was a good 50 feet above the ground in a stupid little metal chair.  You know what hurts?  When your tears freeze to your damn face.  Even worse than the ride up the hill was the whole "getting-off-the-chair" bit.  I fell more getting off the goddamned lift than I did almost any other time!  Argh.  ...But yeah, I really like it.  I'm going back with them again in a few weeks, and plan to continue to do so until they stop going in April.  I might even buy my own equipment if I can pull some money together for it.

The only other big thing that's happened recently is my latest computer catastrophe.  Almost one year since I built my current setup, I finally hit another hardware failure.  There's a very long, angry story here filled with potential data loss, panic, and yelling.  The final outcome is that my motherboard is to blame, and today I ordered a new one.  Going back to ASUS, since I trust them more than any other brand right now.  I hope that this will fix things... I haven't been able to use my desktop for weeks, and that means I haven't been able to work on the game project.  Only thing worse than feeling like you're a failure as you work at home on a project that might not actually get you anywhere is not even being able to do any of that because the one thing you need is broken.  Hah, such is my life - one step forward, three back.  I'm just glad my laptop still sorta works.

Well, I'm out of stuff to say.  Time to sleep, I suppose.

( Christmas Photos! )

I'm gradually succeeding in returning to making posts more often on here.  For a while I was just too bogged down with stuff to try and sit down and summarize it all without typing out a novel, but now things are at least calm enough.

...On the downside, now that I both have the time and initiative to post, I have nothing to post.

I've been working a lot still on that model for the game.  Its coming along really well, and I want to post some images on here soon (and update my portfolio website with it too).  My life has become increasingly boring to the point where I think I'm just accepting it.  I wake up, exercise, shower, do stuff (99% of the time this will involve 3d art for the game, playing games, snacking, or watching some form of Law & Order), and go to bed.  Hm, when I put it like that it almost sounds like a normal routine, aside the part where all of the "do stuff" activities have me in one of two rooms in my house; one of which has curtains I cannot open.

Ah well, not like I want to leave the house right now, what with the 12-15 inches of snow sitting out there, and the additional bunch that's still coming over the next few days.  On the other hand, I've eaten all my snack reserves.  This makes me sad.

Time for bed.